• trigger warnings
    • mention of invalidation
    • mention of being triggered
    • brief talk of ableism
  • content warnings
    • italics


some general guidelines we follow when dealing with dni's:

  • first, check your message wall often! we do it whenever we check our email for notifications. this way, you will know when you have a dni against you and you can make an effort to carry it out, versus getting a warning because you didnt know
  • acknowledge the dni! unless the user explicitly says, "do not respond to this post," we make sure to show the user that we saw what they said and so they know we know! imo, it feels so much worse to tell someone something that is very important to you, no matter what it is, and have them ignore it.
  • do not ask the user why they have requested a dni! unless you have absolutely zero clue why they did so, or you suspect it could be because of something against the guidelines (ex. identifying with a xenogender). asking someone why they made that decision could make them feel unsure about their decision, invalidated, or even triggered. and besides, its not really your business.
  • be respectful of their decision, and validate it. it makes life run a lot smoother than you think. a great response would be something along the lines of this:
    • message sender: "hey could you not interact with me anymore?"
    • message receiver (you): "alright, thank you for letting me know. i respect your decision and ill make sure i dont interact again."
  • make sure to actually keep your promise and respect that dni! one of the best procedures we follow:
    • try to commit the username to memory. this is not required as forcing someone who cant memorize things well to do so would be ableist, but you can write it down somewhere like in your about!
    • check the original poster (op) of the comment/post/message youre looking at before responding to it. and if you accidentally interact, be sure to clarify that and fix your mistake next time

no one asked for this, but hey, thats shower thoughts for ya! hope that helps! :) /lh /g