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Aplatonic is a term used to describe people who do not experience platonic attraction.[1][2] Specifically, it is most commonly employed by aplatonic people to describe a lack of desire to form friendships with specific people, or difficulty forming friendships in general as a result of neurodivergence or trauma.[2]

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Etymology[]

The term uses the Latin prefix a- which means 'a lack of'.[3] It was presumably coined by analogy to asexual and aromantic.

Community[]

The word aplatonic is largely used within the a-spec, particularly aromantic, and neurodivergent communities.[2]

History[]

The word was first proposed by Mr. Shuttershy on the AVEN forum in April 2012.[1] It was seemingly also independently coined by Tumblr user aroarolibrary.[4]

The term saw recognition by The Ace and Aro Advocacy Project and AUREA, two advocacy organizations for a-spec identities, in late 2020.[2][5]

Flag[]

The most popular aplatonic flag was created in October 2014,[6] possibly by Tumblr user swampwyvern.[7] The purple, blue and green stripes were chosen because they are the inverse of "typical colours used to represent friendship" while the "white" stripe represents allosexual and alloromantic aplatonic people. The "white" stripe is actually cream, because the creator found it "slightly more aesthetically pleasing."

This version of the aplatonic flag is recognized by AUREA.[8]

Controversy[]

Ambiguous definitions of the word platonic, both in general and in the LGBTQIA+ community, have caused confusion regarding the definition of the word aplatonic as well.[9] The original coiner applied the word to his feeling of lacking love for or a bond with his friends; later definitions began to describe this in terms of "platonic attraction". Other people have asserted that the word applies only to queerplatonic attraction and have explicitly discounted the experience of "not wanting friends", directly contradicting the original definition.[10]

Perceptions and discrimination[]

Some aplatonic people have described frustration with other people taking their lack of desire to form friendships personally. They have observed that it is seen as "not nice" to not want to be someone's friend.[11]

Additionally, people have used the idea that they "don't have friends" as a way to insult and attack a-spec people in general.[2]

References[]

  1. 1.0 1.1 Mr. Shuttershy: "Aplatonic" (April 6, 2012). asexuality.org.
  2. 2.0 2.1 2.2 2.3 2.4 AUREA: "Aplatonicism 101" (October 1, 2020). aromanticism.org.
  3. Etymyonline definition of the Latin prefix 'a'.
  4. aroarolibrary: "I'm going to make aplatonic a thing." (December 30, 2014). aroarolibrary.tumblr.com.
  5. The Ace and Aro Advocacy Project: "September TAAAP Pride Chats – Platonic Attraction" (September 18, 2020). taaap.org.
  6. pride-flags-for-us: "Aplatonic describes someone who does not experience platonic attraction." (October 5, 2014). web.archive.org.
  7. pride-color-schemes: "Aplatonic". pride-color-schemes.tumblr.com.
  8. AUREA: "All Terms". aromanticism.org.
  9. Coyote: "Definitions of Aplatonic" (July 3, 2020). arocalypse.com.
  10. Mr. Shuttershy: "Aplatonic" (April 6, 2012). asexuality.org.
  11. CharCharChar: "September TAAAP Chat Notes - Aplatonicism". charcharcharace.blogspot.com.
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